April 8, 2009
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I am low low low…
This is being a particularly down evening. It has been a rough couple of weeks with mom in the hospital. She is not near death or anything. Just nothing good is happening. She has been in ICU since March 31st. Each and everyday there has been some new health calamity. She looks great and is getting stronger but her heart and lungs are not in a very good way.
We were informed last night, after a CAT scan, that she has two blood clots in her lungs. Lower lobe, I believe. Probably caused from the surgery. For the past week they have been trying to stabilize her heart with three different medications and not one is working out. Her her heart rate shoots up to almost double usually when she is sleeping. They figure the blood clots are causing this.
The best action to take is blood thinners, not healthy, but they can help to break down the blood clot in many cases. Unfortunately for mom, she has some internal bleeding. The cause of this, we do not know, but kick ass blood thinners are out of the question. They would cause her to bleed to death.
Mom was the saddest I have seen her this evening. I came home sad too. My kids were both here and we got into a squabble. Kids have no perspective and I have no energy to do anything but to say “GO HOME NOW!”
It just made me feel so down. I called poor Debi about cleaning this week and bended her ear far too long. Oh the troubles I have seen….Thank you for listening Debi. Ack…
My daughter and I hung out downtown most of the day and she cooked dinner that eve
I went to Placerville this weekend to collect some important papers for mom, I took all of Saturday off. I am mostly not working but I am at the hospital. I know mom appreciates it tons.
That is Joc and my ex-husband, P’ville local, Greggy
This is kind of funny. A local restaurant that has been around for as long as I lived up the hill (that would just be years and years until recently) finally closed it’s doors. In proper small town form they posted a letter of good by on their former front door that read:“CLOSED FOR A REASON.
30 years of Lil’ Mama’s, Lil’ Papa’s, Lil’ Jonnie’s has come to an end.Thank you for your patronage and some wonderful memories. “Nothing Lasts forever, not even sadness.”The gossip with all the name changes is just as juicy and mysterious as that note on the door.
Small town living. Fucking hilarious. That is why us hicks live so long. We laugh so hard. At ourselves mostly, I reckon…
Comments (16)
Nothing lasts forever, even sadness.
I’m praying for you, Cass, and your Mom.
I am.
Low, low, low days are not fun but I will keep you in my positive thoughts as well as your Mom!
Sorry to hear about your mom. It’s exhausting ..emotionally and physically..to wait in the ICU waiting room, but you wouldn’t want to be anywhere else.
Sending up prayers for your mom and you and your family!
Christy
@greatredwoman - geeze, I am right beside her bed for all the action except the bedpan. It is exhausting but I am glad I am able to be there. Thank you so much and love and hugs to you on your brand new adventure. I cannot wait for you to tell us what that is!!!
don’t forget to take out some time to look after you
and I must be blind..I only see 2 people in the “That is Joc and my ex-husband and P’ville local, Greggy” photo
My dear cassi I am both admirative and worried to see you so caring and devoted for your mom . You will tell me ” what I do is normal ” . Yes and Janine did the same for her aunt , her mom and father . But it is a grieving and exhausting trial . Be sure I share and support you ;
Love
Michel
Sorry about your mom, I hope they are able to sort something out. Will a hug lift you a wee bit from low? (((((hugs)))))
I’m so sorry your mom is having all of these health issues. It’s a catch 22 with the blood clots and blood thinners and the internal bleeding. I know this is depressing her, which is completely normal, but not easy none the less. It’s hard to love someone and watch this happen. All you can do is be her comfort and companion and stay on top of the doctors and nurses, question everything, get explanations when you’re confused with the medical jargon and ride them like a race horse.
Remember to take care you YOU as well, which isn’t easy I know. We do what we have to do in this life and sometimes we have to let the chips fall where they may. Even though you have other worries in your life, caring for your mom is the most important thing you can do right now. The universe will watch over you and you’ll reap many rewards for your compassion.
Love to you and your mom. You’re in my heart, as always.
Sorry to hear you are low. I will say a prayer for both you and your mom.
@Myst - sorry about that, that was poor wording on my part. There are only two peeps in that photo.
So sorry about your mum. It is emotionally exhausting I’m sure. Just remember that the little note is right… “Nothing Lasts forever, not even sadness.”
March right into that hospital, grab the head doctor by his lapels and tell him that you want your mom fixed right now! It may work…..
Thinking of you both. It’s good to get some rest when possible.
Sorry to hear your mom is still struggling. Hope she beats the doctors once again!