For very true reasons because she is definitely steadily improving and doing better daily and selfishly because it will be so wonderful to just go home after work.

Work is so so so busy. I work late every night and usually work through most of lunch. Going right home afterward instead of fighting traffic and sitting around a hospital room only to go home to finish up work (this I will still do...) I needed to take home is going to be so amazingly awesome.

Poor poor pitiful me...you know it is not true. I am just whining. Being a baby ass.

I did in fact bring that sweet little Benz home. It is sitting in my carport right now. This is a cute little car. I will not be able to drive it much til next week. I have my mom's Jeep, my Fiat is being extremely persnickety this time around. More headache then head turner. Knowing that mom would be coming home any time, I left the convertible at her place and have been borrowing her Jeep since the weekend. I will have to drive her Jeep home for the night after taking her home since the Fiat's head lights sometimes work and sometimes...not so much...It is so very very Italian.

I love it.

My weekend has been pretty a-ok.

I realize that this is going to make me sound like an awful daughter BUTTTTT...the Fiat is having so many issues that driving to the hospital to see mom is a no can do the last two days. And I appreciate the break.

So two whole days off in a row are quite nice. Meanwhile, I have to track down a neighbor to jump start the Fiat in the morning so that I can drive to her house to borrow her Jeep, as I am sure she will be turned loose from the hospital any day now. I cannot drive her home in the Fiat. Hoping for a jump start in the hospital parking garage...ACK!

I hope to visit my daughter when I am up there running her errands. I miss my beautiful girl.

The same friend and I went to downtown Sacramento this night to check out the Second Saturday Art About Town shin dig. Music on the streets, sidewalk vendors, wine and food everywhere you went. And of course, ART. Very nice night. The weather was windy but really good. I needed the de-stressing. My head is about to implode or explode. Life is just too much these past several months.

The job is going well. I continue to like the company and the position, they continue to pay me. My supervisor is also very understanding about the mom situation. Believe me, I am losing sleep over this stuff.

I am in the best mood I have been in for months. I am grateful for new friends and good times.

I am running around via the internet checking in on you all. It is so cool to visit again.

I have internet access at work and it is not a problem to connect but I have no time. I am enjoying my job and it is really really busy. I try to check my e-mail but that is about all I have time for.

Mom is still in the hospital but stabilizing. I suspect she will be kicked out any day now.

My life is very very boring these days. Just work and the hospital. I could bitch about that but I see no reason to. Mom is a handful and there that is.

I have a three day weekend but I am spending some of it working. On purpose.

I have been cleaning for some people for the past year and a half. I did not want to leave them high and dry with this new job. I am hoping to train someone to help my friends out if they so choose.

My daughter's friend, Jessalyn, needs to make some cash. She is a gifted artist and lovely human. She wondered if she might help out with the cleaning since my kids are pretty much unavailable these days. Heck yeah!

We cleaned two places today. My first job has no problem having her clean regularly. My second place needs to meet her and so forth. No matter, we definitely did some training.

On top of that, my friend, Shelly, offered the use of herself and her truck to pick up the couch that I had bought this past week off of craigslist.

She helped me before to empty out my storage unit about three years ago, I cannot believe she offered to help me again. My easy peasy jobs always turn into major events. Or nightmares...This one included.

I had to empty the room of my old furniture to make room for the new furniture.  I was hoping that some of this stuff might fit into the spare room. No such luck. Both the couch and love seat are too awkward to fit through the doorway. It took math, patience and a keen eye to get them out of the house. Shelly was the wizard on all accounts. Jessalyn and I were the backs.

Once the living room was emptied it was time to go fetch the "new" stuff. The new couch pieces were considerably lighter than the old couch. But, I had to make things difficult. The couple had a huge nappy dread wool rug for sale. I inquired how much and then HAD to have it. It matched the couch perfectly. I already knew the rug I own would really not go with that couch.

That huge wool rug weighed more than the couch pieces combined. It took four of us to move it. And there were only three of us to unload it. I am a pain in the ass...

We got the truck loaded with all the stuff, tied down but Shelly was a little concerned. Fortunately, her sister lived very near by. She called her to see if her sis's husband might take a look at the load, double check the tie downs and give us the thumbs up. No problem.

They were having a little get together and did not mind our interruption. Her sis has two gorgeous tow headed kids. Her son Cooper was running around all nekkid and eating crackers. He just cracked us up.

We did a much better job than this!

The hub double checked and our load, did one more safety cable and gave us the thumbs up. We were on the road. This last haul was the easiest after all that pushing and pulling on my old sofa and love seat. We got everything in, I cleaned and moved what I could out of the way.

The next step was to buy those girls dinner and make margaritas for a job well done. I could never had done any of it without them. They were major studettes. I am fortunate and doubly blessed to have so many good people in my life. Shelly is so dear and always there when I need her. That woman is an angel. Truly. Thank you Shell, I love you to bits and pieces.

Check out the new room decor!!!

I will be sitting around right about here watching movies and making big plans and dreaming big dreams...

I will go visit my mom tomorrow. I may clean another place on Monday, but I do have Monday off.

Have a great weekend! Thank you for letting me share.

!

She is home and doing only ok. I had to take a step back this past day or two. I talk to her daily and Kaiser has a nurse, a physical therapist and an aide calling on her at home. She is not alone.

The day I took her home from the hospital I was out until eleven o'clock at night picking up her prescriptions and groceries. I have been in no mood for frivolities these past few days.

Just hunkered down, going to work and BEING home.

Work is fine. I have this huge stress that they will fire me due to all the constant interruptions of my mom's stuff. I received no less than ten phone calls on Monday, the day I took her home. It is insane. I still have Kaiser and the medical appliance place calling my cell phone. 

I have been MAXED out. So...

I bought a couch off of craigslist. It is the coolest couch in the history of couches. I wish I had a photo. I knew that when I saw it in person I would have to have it...it was true.

Ok, that is what I do when I stress out big time. I hit craigslist.

xo
Cassi

My mother is insane.

Bat shit  insane.

Ok ok ok...I know she has been through so so so much and finally she is doing better. I honestly thought she was going to die over Mother's day weekend. I really did. So did the whole intensive care unit. So did several of my relatives that had visited at that time.

That old woman pulled through with sheer tenacity I think she is too mean to die. He he he...

Mom is chomping at the bit to get out of the hospital. I know I know I know...it has been over eight weeks since she was rushed to the ER with that broken hip. I understand how sick she is of being at the hospital. I have had, up until today, huge empathy and sympathy for her plight.

Regrettably, we neglected to get her on the nicotine patch this last visit. She was so so so sick that it the nicotine fits were hardly noticeable, what with her almost dyeing and all.

Well, her anxiety level was visible Friday and yesterday. This morning the shit hit the fan.

 She was verbally assaulting my brother and the nurses first thing this morning. She knew better than to call me before 10 am on the weekend. My brother called me to let me know what was going on (he told me her infection was coming out of her mouth...). So, I called mom. I too was tongue lashed. I had to hang up on her.

My brother is setting loose the flea bombs as I type...

They are releasing her. To her home. Her fucking death trap, flea bag, broken down shit hole of a home.

She wanted me to take her home today. The hospital person who coordinates the discharges had ordered some equipment to be sent to her home but it would not arrive until tomorrow. I talked mom into waiting to go home tomorrow, after I got off from work. That way everything would be there.

You should have heard her making plans. She cannot use a toilet and can barely raise her self out of bed without help. She was going to use a five gallon bucket in place of the commode that had been ordered for the overnight.

I have dealt with her spoiled brat shit fits my entire life. I do not tolerate them any more. She does not scare me like she use to. I am not being a bad bossy daughter. I am not trying to control her in any way. No one can tell her what to do. I am just making sure that some voice of reason is maintained. Saying straight out that this five gallon bucket idea would end up her toppled over covered in her own piss and shit. Oh yeah, I said that.

Tough love...what ever.

I am so sick of this whole thing. I have other really stressful things going on in my life trying to get caught back up and feeling like a real person again. The job is going well and I am excited about signing up for night classes in the fall. This mom thing, I am very glad that I am able to be there for her but her freakish insane behavior is killing me.

Ok...that is what my fucking weekend is all about. Bleh...I want to be somewhere else. Somewhere very very far away from all this baloney. I want mom to be healthful and able to live any way she wants. Her awful cruel mouth, I am just so tired of it. I overlook it mostly, but I am just too tired to be patient with her right now. It really is in the name of her better health. I want what is best for her. She just wants to go home NOW.

How are you xanga crew? Sorry for my whiny drivel. But, I feel better to just write this stuff down.

I had to take a night off from mom tonight exhausted. I did drive my son home. He spent the night last night because it was the night he got

HIS FIRST TATTOO!

Yeah!

He and I went to the hospital to visit my mom. She is doing ok. Not great but hanging in there. I cannot tell you anything good. But, she is improving. I do not feel optimistic about things but you never know. She has a will of iron. She could just turn that corner to wellness for real...or not...I hope for the best.

After our visit to mom we headed over to my friends, Fawn and Mario's. It was tattoo time! Fawn had been working up fonts for the design my son chose.  Of course, once we were there, he had some more ideas so they played with lettering for a good half an hour before Michael decided what he wanted. This was my birthday present to him.

Fawn and I chatted, her daughter Kyllea showed me her rubbery rubbery toys. I drank beers. Michael had Kombucha tea. Mario has his tattoo set up in their dining room. Very sterilized and organized. He was ready to ink.

Once Mario was done with Michael's tat, well, the night was young. Fawn thought he should repair a tattoo that I have. It is the first tattoo I had done, in 1994, I believe. At that time I had a name with it. A couple of years ago I had the name covered and the guy did a really shoddy job of covering it. So, Mario thought he could spruce up the tattoo and do a better job of covering the name. Well, Mario did a great job repairing my angel!

Mom is doing much better today. Thank you very much for your kind words and well wishes. Mom thanks you too. She thinks all your prayers helped, and I know they did. I want you all to know that and I love you for that.

The new job is going really really well. I did not expect this and am really appreciate something to take my mind off my mom. The office is nice, the work is interesting and a I am catching on pretty quickly. I did not feel all that optimistic about this but, wow, I do now.

There that is.